Cheers!!

According to Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs I was having a feeling of disconnect when it came to belonging to the Des Plains community. That was because I would go to the library say Hello to my neighbors but that was about it, a few months ago I was a little sad because now that I wasn’t going to school, aside from dance I didn’t feel a sense of belonging. That all changed when I joined Toastmasters. It all began when my mom found a flyer at my library when she was getting books for my brother’s business. Toastmasters is a group of dedicated individuals from all walks of life who come together to improve their speaking skills and help other Toastmasters do so as well. I was worried about what they would think of me, but from the very start the other Toastmasters have been very welcoming. They look at me first and then say, “Ok, you have these challenges can we assist you?” One of the Toastmasters noticed I was having trouble keeping my place while reading, the next morning I found things in an e-mail from him that might make it easier for me to read my speeches in the future. Another person has volunteered to walk me home if it gets to dark. Even though I have taken a speech class in college and speak in front of a lot of different groups at work, I am still very intimidated to do my first speech because a lot of them have been doing this for years but I am also happy to be doing it in front of a supportive group of people. As a result of joining Toastmasters I am learning new skills, meating new people, getting homework, helping others and being a part of a group. It feels great!!!
Cheers
-Jessi

My Extreme Makeover

In today’s society some people are afraid to ask for help. We often think that our friends, family and greater community is to busy to help us or that asking for help would be too much of a burden on the ones we love. However, what I have come to realize throughout my work with the IAMC is that lots of people want the chance to help someone, they just don’t know how. The world is smaller than we think, everybody knows somebody. In the olden days people would help each other with everything without a question or hesitation. That is what you, my readers did for me. I expressed a need and you came through. I truly believe that if it wasn’t for your generosity and KOKO’s willingness to step in I, wouldn’t be sitting in this chair typing this. You all donated to me because you saw my true potential and the gifts I have to offer the world. By donating you not only helped me, but you helped spread the message of generosity and working together to make a difference. Here is the video of what I like to call my extreme makeover.

Now as expected with any new chair there are adjustments that have to be made to make the person more comfortable. After waiting a while I decide that I am hungry so my mom and I decide to get snacks by pushing me in an office chair. We ask someone in the hospital where we can get snacks and off we go. When we get in the elevator a little boy looks at us like we are crazy. I am sure he was thinking I have seen a lot of crazy stuff but this, this is crazy. I guess when there’s a will there’s a way.

Finally this month I got to go skiing for the first time. I have wanted to go skiing since I was ten years old, it was a long time to wait but well worth it. Now I am totally in love with the sport. I have never felt this way before, I can't believe I am saying this but for the first time in my life I don’t want it to stop snowing so I can do it again and again and again. For those of you who haven’t skied before go do it. It is very exhilarating. I can cross another thing off my bucket list. My next goal is to go skiing in Colorado and or Utah after all I would love to go skiing with my cousin Ben and I haven’t seen my camp friends in forever. Plus I have never been to Utah and hear that like Colorado they have a great program for people with physical disabilities.
Thank you for making it possible for me to keep rolling!
With all my love and gratitude,
Jessi

What a start to the year!!!

Before I begin with my real post for the month I would like to introduce you to something new that I have created for the blog. They are called snap shots they are things that I forgot to say and or explain in previous posts.

Snap shot number one. Thank you to Hannah for letting me borrow her charger in November so I could go on my business trips. You’re the greatest! Snap shot number two. I realize now that I never put choreographing a dance on my bucket list but it is something I have always wanted to do and I am glad it happened in November. We are having rehearsals soon so it can be shown at other places.

2011 has been an exciting year for me so far. We were all sitting around my mom and dad’s kitchen table having a microboard meeting. I was reading the agenda out loud as usual and I said ok now we are on the last one. Then after a very brief discussion my mom said ok there is one more thing to discuss. I said ok I don’t see it. She said turn the page. It was blank. I was confused. She said turn it again and the next page reads talk about Jessi’s new puppy. On that page was a picture of a puppy that I found out later was a Cavapoo a cavalier king charles spaniel mixed with a poodle. I was in complete shock. After a moment of silence I screamed oh my G-d. You have got to be kidding me. Oh my gosh. Over and over again. At this point my brother says to me are you hyperventilating. I then say are the girls ok with this and the rest is history. He is my new love. I am beyond greatful for all the hard work mom, Tonya, Mina, Lindsy and Rebecca are doing to train him to be the best dog he can be. Once again I can cross something off my bucket list. Thank you is not enough Mom and Dad for how happy I am to have a dog as a member of the purple pad. After much thought I have decided to name him Teddy. One of the things I have always wanted since I moved in was a dog and now man’s best friend is here to stay.

Teddy and I wish you all happiness and joy in 2011 as we begin our new life together.

From the happiest dog owner in Des Plains,

-Jessi

Counting My Blessings...

This past month has not been the greatest for me emotionally. I am not telling you this so you can feel sorry for me, just to be realistic because I feel it is important to share the good and the bad with you, my readers. Even though I have been in the purple pad for quite some time now there are still periods of time when I think, did I make the right decision to be here? I am homesick. Should I be home for good? Can I handle this? This is too much for me. Am I good enough? With that said I am very greatful for the opportunities I had this month. I went to a conference for the second year in a row called Speak Up and Speak Out. It is a wonderful opportunity for people with disabilities to learn from each other, sell different products and have fun. Both years I had an amazing time! I also went to a conference for the IAMC. It was really nice because I was able to enjoy myself and it didn’t feel like work at all. At the conference we focused on two planning tools for the future called path and maps. It was also a wonderful opportunity to network with others, because like Speak Up and Speak Out we were from all over the state of Illinois. This month I was able to cross something off my bucket list and that is choreograph a dance. It was a lot of fun to see it unfold, my dancers worked very hard. We had an informal showing and I hope to have it in a real performance soon. That would be like icing on the cake. Thank you to those who came and watched. This past week I had a chance to go down town and talk to first year medical students about my life, my challenges, cerebral palsy and other things. For Thanksgiving, my family and I went to St. Louis. It was a yummy time had by all. Brimer’s, thanks for all the delicious food and early Hanukkah Gifts. Now, you might be wondering, did I get my wheelchair yet? No, but I am getting there. This weekend I participated in a singles auction at the Keep On Keeping On's Santa Cause holiday fundraiser to help raise money for my new chair. It was a big success and a lot of fun! Thank you KOKO and all of you who have donated so far and/or came to see me at the event! I feel so blessed that so many people care. So I am trying to count my blessings and remind myself that I am who I am for a reason. I encourage you to do the same, do something from your heart this holiday season, make something, donate clothes, toys, money, volunteer, call or write to someone you haven’t been in touch with for a while. Whatever you want to do. I am going to end by sharing this song because it helps me when I am down and I think it helps to express my message this month.

The stars look like they're not shining
Her hair, her hair
Falls perfectly without her trying

She's so beautiful
And I tell her every day

Yeah I know, I know
When I compliment her
She wont believe me
And its so, its so
Sad to think she don't see what I see

But every time she asks me do I look okay
I say

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

Her nails, her nails
I could kiss them all day if she'd let me
Her laugh, her laugh
She hates but I think its so sexy

She's so beautiful

And I tell her every day

Oh you know, you know, you know
I'd never ask you to change
If perfect is what you're searching for
Then just stay the same

So don't even bother asking
If you look okay
You know I say

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

The way you are
The way you are
Girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

Love to all and happy holidays!

-Jessi

The Unforgotton Hero

"Have you ever seen a more joyful face?" "The toughest I ever met." "Schwass dedicated life to inspiring others."

These are three headlines to articles written in memory of Michael Schwass, my confidante, mentor and friend. I think these headlines really do justice to who Michael really was. He helped me from the very start in getting me comfortable with living on my own. He helped me with confidence building, managing and creating better relationships with my assistants and better relationships with my family, to name a few. He even suggested that I try to find a place in the same building where he worked. You see, this is very bittersweet for me, he worked at 907 and I live in 607. There were periods of time when I saw him virtually every week or so, and sometimes I didn't see him much at all. But his strength and motivation was there, and I knew I could call on him in times of struggle. To find out more about Michael Schwass and why he was so significant for me and others who knew him you can read his book, "Don't Blame the Game." This is a chronicle of his life and describes what kind of a person he was. I hope you get inspired after reading the book. In memory of him I would like to include the lyrics to this song.

"Hold On" by B*Witched

Hold on, hold on,
hold on, hold on,
hold on, hold on.....

You've always been a tough girl,
but you feel you're about to break
You're feeling stuck and out of love
watching your dreams all slip away
been working mornings in the kitchen
and working nights at the corner store
as your life goes by, you wonder why
and you know that there's got to be something more.

Hold on,
but don't hold too tight
let go,
it's going to be all right
don't run away from what your heart is sayin' oh
be strong,
and face what you're afraid of
Come on,
show them what you're made of
I know it's hard when your hope is gone
but you've gotta keep holding on.

You hear a voice that is calling
and it's telling you to make a change
it's time to fly, and say goodbye
and move on to a better place
you know you've got to take the first step
to get to where you wanna be
just get on track, and don't look back
'cause it's the only way that you're gona be free.

Hold on,
but don't hold too tight
let go,
it's going to be allright
don't run away from what your heart is sayin' oh
be strong,
and face what you're afraid of
Come on,
show them what you're made of
I know it's hard when your hope is gone
but you've gotta keep holding on.

(Bridge)
Hold on......
you're gonna make it,you're gonna be stronger
hold on......
hang in there baby, just a little bit longer
hold on......
yeah, you're gonna be fine
don't give up, be strong
when the going get's though
you gotta hold on

Hold on,
but don't hold too tight
let go,
it's going to be all right
don't run away from what your heart is sayin' oh
be strong,
and face what you're afraid of
Come on,
show them what you're made of
I know it's hard when your hope is gone
but you've gotta keep holding on.

Hold on,
but don't hold too tight
let go,
it's going to be allright
don't run away from what your heart is sayin' oh
be strong,
and face what you're afraid of
Come on,
show them what you're made of
I know it's hard when your hope is gone
but you've gotta keep yeah, holding on..........

Hold on.........,
hold on,
hold on...

I think that these words really describe what he was trying to teach me and what he would want me to do now and always. I hope they motivate you in some way too. Treat each day like there is a significant purpose to why you are living it. Because there is! I believe he lived by this quote.

Thanks for all the love and support while mom and dad were in the holy land.

With much love,

Jessi

Baby Steps

Today marks the day of my second anniversary at the purple pad. I have definitely gone through several bumps. But, it has made me a stronger person. I have had to change a number of assistants. I have had to deal with having a room mate and not having one. I graduated from Oakton Community College and dealt with the realization about not being able to go to Northeastern this fall. But, throughout this whole experience. I have been reminded about a bracelet that my mom had given me. Its so eloquently reads." Its all about the journey not the destination." My journey has allowed me to stay in this apartment for two years with people who care about me and support me in my everyday life. Even though it has been two years. I am still amazed that this has become a reality for me. When, I first moved in. I felt like a little seed that was ready to grow. But, not sure of myself. Now, with the experiences that I have had in these past two years. I feel like I am able to do more things. With the help of this blog and the fact that I care about people. Another, one of my dreams has come true. I am beginning to motivate and mentor people that are less fortunate then myself. So, that their dreams of living independently or just their dreams in general can become a reality. Its all about the baby steps and that is how I got here. It was no magic pill or no magic fairy. It was just the love and support from my family, friends and readers. That helped me to be where I am today. I would like to also dedicate this post to my uncle Eddie and aunt Sherri in honor of his birthday. Thank you for being my most avid readers. Also, thank you mom for making sure my chair keeps rolling. I would like to end with this quote that I got from my friend Scott Crane. "It's not the disability that defines you, it's how you deal with the challenges the disability presents you with. We have an obligation to the abilities we DO have, not the disability". - Jim Abbott

Home Sweet Home

Jess

lean on me

I could not let this month go by without including this song!

Sometimes in our lives we all have pain

We all have sorrow
But if we are wise
We know that there's always tomorrow

Lean on me, when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Til I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on

Please swallow your pride
If I have things you need to borrow
For no one can fill those of your needs
That you don't let show

Lean on me, when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Til I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on

If there is a load you have to bear
That you can't carry
I'm right up the road
I'll share your load
If you just call me

So just call on me brother, when you need a hand
We all need somebody to lean on
I just might have a problem that you'd understand
We all need somebody to lean on

Lean on me when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
Till I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on

Lean on me...

Thank you for your love and support!